A Much Needed Break

{dress: Free People; cardi: American Eagle (hand-me-down); shoes: Steven by Steve Madden}

Remember when I was sick a couple weeks ago? Well ever since then I've completely gotten out of the habit of working out. It felt so good to stop and take a break that I just never started it back up. Now normally this should be a bad thing but for me, it just might be a good thing. There is a daily battle within me about calorie intake versus outtake. Most of the time I'm working out to be able to eat more and feel little and toned. I should be working out for my health. I should be working out for my heart, for my strength, to build endurance. But when I wake up extra early to squeeze in a workout before work I'm doing it to meet society's standards of beauty. Yes, it's the truth. It's hard to admit something like that when I'm so against succumbing to our culture's impossibly thin ideal but even though I'm in recovery I still very much struggle with it. When I workout in the mornings day after day after day I often feel exhausted and drained. My stomach feels awful and I never feel really rested. But ever since I've replaced my early morning workouts with more sleep I've felt so much better. I actually feel rested and although my appetite has lessened, my stomach feels so much better. Who would have thought?! But I don't like feeling so stagnate and lazy. So, I have decided to ask you all to hold me accountable to listening to my body and possibly working out every other day even if I feel good enough to work out every day. Instead of looking to people like Gwyneth Paltrow who I look up to in many ways but believe she works her body too hard to achieve her incredibly svelte frame, I should look to people like Kate Winslet who embraces the body she has and doesn't work tirelessly at molding it into a size it's not meant to be. As my friend reminded me today, our bodies are temples and should be treated with care and not worked to the ground to become a certain size. When we need rest, we should give our bodies rest. We should be healthy and active and give our bodies the nutrients they need. I'm glad I've gotten this much needed rest. It's forced me to take a step back, as I've often had to do, and get some much needed perspective. If having the "perfect" body means being unhealthy and feeling like crap all the time then it's far from worth it. Who am I trying to impress anyway? Myself and only myself. Well, that's my body image vent/rant/call it what you will for the day.

Oh and the last picture is my latest obsession. Coconut water, where have you been all my life? You are so refreshing and delicious and healthy! I am smitten.